Grand Canyon Stories and Tips

One Sure Fire Way to Get your Luggage Inspected

My vision  Photo, Grand Canyon, Arizona

Ok, so I have told you about experiences that have left me speechless and had tears in my eyes. But I had to end with a story that left me in stitches.

After shopping for my children at the 3 Dog Bakery, Pam and I headed out to our Pink Jeep Tour. As we were heading towards the offices it dawned on me, I had to get their presents home and remarked to Pam "geeze I hope they don’t have drug sniffing dogs at the airport since they will certainly sniff out this huge bone".

On my final night I was busy packing my bags. I put my bag with babies’ goodies right on top. After all I knew they would be happy to see mommy and then would want to know what I got them. When I arrived back into Charlotte I made my way to the luggage carousel and one piece of luggage was the first off the conveyer belt. However I stood and stood waiting for my other piece of luggage. I was starting to think after all of these years my luggage finally gets lots. When sure enough here comes my red luggage with the dozen luggage tags on the handle. I grab it and make my way to my car and head on home. When I get home I wearily threw my luggage on my bed to unpack and notice a bright red sticker on the airline luggage sticker. It read "Inspected by TSA". So apparently someone had drug sniffing dogs somewhere. And when I opened my luggage, my bag of goodies that had been on top was shoved down on the side and there were teeth marks on my luggage!

OK, but let me go back and add something else. I have mentioned several times that I do not drink alcoholic beverages but love wine labels. While at the resort gift shop in Williams I mentioned to my roommate Pam that I would have to get a bottle of wine with the train on it for the label. I explained I didn’t drink but just wanted the label. The following night at the Maswick Lodge when they had a dinner for us, Pam went up to the bar and came back with empty wine bottle for me. She asked the bar tender if she could have the empty wine bottle. Since they were going to toss it anyway, she gladly turned it over to Pam. So she gave it to me so I didn’t have to by a $13 bottle of wine just for the label.

Word got out about my wine label obsession. By the time I let I have 2 wine bottles, a champagne bottle, and 2 bottles from local made beer (my label obsession actually extends to any kind of local made booze, not just wine). And so guess what piece of luggage all of those empty booze bottle were in.? Yep, the red one with the dog treats that was inspected by TSA.

As I unpacked my contraband luggage and located the kid’s treats I noticed that apparently they had inspected the whole things since things were out of place (I never leave my bag of dirty clothes on top). Then it just hit me and I started to laugh. I am having visions of this big TSA inspector (and in my vision he reminded me of the crazy sheriff actor Ron Pearlman played in the Stephen King movie Desperation ). I could just see him thinking he had a big drug bust, but instead discovered his dogs had sniffed out dog bones and cookies. Then I seeing him snarking and laughing at my dog cookies and hold them up all the time saying "ain’t that special..Halloween cookies…for dogs". Then to make sure that was all there was, they went through my luggage and found about half a dozen empty booze bottles then declaring "and it looks like she has a big drinking problem".

Now I have no idea what actually happened other than my luggage did get inspected. But I figured it gave me an amusing story. Just next time I travel, I will remember to bring the wine label removers with me. At least that way if my luggage gets inspected again, they will only find the dog treats!

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