We left Kansas City (MCI) on a cold morning with some snow cover on January 11th, 2008.
The auto check-in gizmo at the terminal desk (U.S.Air) went insane after I typed in my reservation number. It recognized our four reservations but refused to print boarding passes... so, I waited for those who had been behind me in the regular line to be cleared and then had the attendant (with the aid of a supervisor) type in my info on their computer, void the malfunction and manually print our passes. They informed me that the automatic terminals were extremely unreliable and it's always faster (as I am a preferred member with them) to wait for a human. Now I know.
Even though our big bag was about seven pounds overweight, they checked us in and we were off. Except for the constant of extremely overpriced food and beverages in airports, everything was calm and orderly and went without a hitch. We boarded and took off within one minute of schedule and, except that we weren't seated together (the reservation was made back in September - and I always request adjacent seats near the front of the plan) and in nearly the last row.
As we taxied away, the video monitors, located above every third or fourth seat, popped up and down a few times. Once settled, they began to play scenes of distant locations (some of which I don't think U.S.Air goes to) interrupted by some sort of commercial every minute or two. Just before we took off, the crew announced that we'd be sprayed with de-icer (somewhat soothing notion, no?) and that there was some difficulty with the video player so they'd have to do the safety demonstration the old fashioned way - which is just as well, because, as we learned in later and longer flights, that video monitor was like a flashing billboard located right beside your bedroom window. About 15 commercials repeated every 30 minutes only somewhat muted after the PA was turned off and the headphones of our, quite likely deaf, co-passengers broke up what should have been relative quiet.
If there were kids on board you wouldn't have known it. No screaming or crying just the occasional interruption by an air waitress trying to convince somebody, anybody, to buy a box of crackers for $5 or a re-heated Lean Cuisine for $10. I did not see a single taker. Sodas and miniature pretzels soon followed.
Landing was smooth and on-time and we were all packed out in a smartly fashion. Phoenix Sky Harbor (PHX) is on the nice side of mega airports. Plenty of opportunity to find food and drink, restrooms, CNN, moving walkways, bagged snack and souvenirs - all at double the price those in the free outside world enjoy, with, of course, no coupons accepted.
We boarded our connecting flight (U.S.Air 45) just a couple minutes late and pushed out *a few feet* from the gate a couple minutes later. It was all time a pilot could easily make up en-route. After two hours of sitting in the plane - a tightly packed one with plenty of kids who might have done well if we'd have gotten off the ground - one of the crew informed us that there was a little difficulty and he'd keep us informed on the progress every ten or fifteen minutes or so. Ten minutes later, he announced that the heater on the air-speed doo-hicky was misconbobulated (or something like that) and that workers were "on there way" to fix it.
At this moment my somewhat precocious five and a half year old announced to the cabin (including a private pilot on my right who insisted this problem was a non-issue for a flight from PHX southward) "It's probably a broken wire!"
Everyone chuckled - and we needed it. Ten more minutes later and the voice chimed in again with the fact that it was indeed a broken wire. It would take about two-hours to fix this (here my son announced he could do it faster - no one chuckled but some seemed willing to let him try since he'd done so well with the diagnosis) so, we would all be de-planed (just leave everything) and re-boarded when all was ready. The plane lurched the 10 feet back to the gate just as people started to stand.
Ten minutes later, another voice announced that they were sorry for the delay and that, once in the terminal, we'd all be plied with water, soda and snacks - in recompense for making the flight a couple hours longer than it should have been. Fine.
The doors finally open and fresh air rushes in (remember, we're at the back of the plane, so that was a mighty whoosh) and the first voice returns to the intercom to announce that, instead of leaving everything where it is, take everything with you and head to a different concourse/gate where they've pulled another plan into service.
The very full plane unloads and everyone rushes down to the new gate. The gate attendant there knows nothing about the change. The airport loudspeaker announces that those people who were already waiting for the plane we were about to take, would now be delayed and needed to hoof it to the previous gate. After about ten minutes of confusion, the gate attendant told us all to take a seat, it'd be about 15 minutes before the plane was serviced and ready. Nearly an hour later, she returned to ask how many children were on board (now shouldn't they have had a record of that handy?) and to get out our boarding passes. Several folks couldn't find their stubs and, in the end, they simply let anybody who wandered up get on board with neither an ID check nor manifest check nor ticket stub. So, even though we all resumed our previous places... there were one or two new faces in the crowd. With a little re-arranging we were able to get the whole family (two adults, two children under six) within shouting distance of each other... and we were finally off. A total of nearly four hours of delay.
Oh, you may have forgotten about the offer of water and snacks, many of those on-board did not forget, those who complained were offered FREE headphones for the movie! No, really. They were charging $5 for 99-cent store headphones to watch a movie no one wanted to see (Disney's "Game Plan" starring famous wrestler turned 'actor', "The Rock"). Drinks would be brought around as soon as they finished trying, in vain, to pass off their $5 "goody boxes" and $10 airplane dinners. Except for being terribly, terribly late, there were no further problems.
We arrived to the truck mounted 1950's style long staircase (complete with an assortment of malfunctioning lights that flickered on and off as you clumped down the stairs) well after sundown (instead of being lagoon side at our hotel to enjoy it) and found that we had left one of the children's books on the plane. Now, of course, security on this open lava field airport was never going to allow me to return to the plane to fetch it, but a nice woman said she'd look through the seat pockets of the whole plane, if necessary, to find it. THIRTY minutes later, we found her chatting with a coworker beside the baggage carrousel. She looked a bit confused at first but then said that she had checked everywhere and the book simply wasn't there. She said the cleaning crew was just going aboard and took our local number so she could tell us when she sent it our way. Three other calls, a drop by and a final questioning upon departure provided no information on the book - or that we had ever previously asked about it. It was, of course, a favorite which must be replaced. U.S. Air has not and does not seem interested in looking into what happened or offering any compensation for the lousy flight or the misplaced book. You'd think they could shake loose one of those snack boxes to make a kid feel a little better about his lost book... but no offer of any kind came.
The return of the car and the flight back were uneventful - though we were still seated against the rear restrooms... at least we were all together.
Moral of the story, I guess, is, don't make your reservations in advance and think they'll stay made. Keep calling in every week or so to keep them on track.
POSTSCRIPT:
US Air, to patch up our strained relationship, has sent each of us a $75 voucher against future air travel (good for one year).
I have to give them credit for that... it's a lot better than Hilton did.
FURTHER POSTSCRIPT:
Turns out the $75 vouchers can't be used with internet or discount fares and so EVERY OTHER AIRLINES flies cheaper EVERYWHERE!