All I can say is a horrible cheer-leading camp! We arrived at Club Med to be greeted with nice cool down clothes an a fruity drink while the G.O.’s (the employees are known as Gracious Organizers) went over a few things we us the G.M. (Gracious Members). The drinks were great but I just wanted to head off to the room. So we (my cousin Dawn and I) and one of the G.O.’s headed off to the rooms. Each group of people were lead to their room by a G.O., while walking the G.O. started explaining the accommodations and meals and so on! So with the mindless chitchat our G.O. initiated she proceeded to ask us where we were from, well we are from the US specifically Pennsylvania, she DUMBFOUNDLY asked us where that was, stunned we replied "where are YOU from?" She was from Montreal, Canada, and she really had no idea where NY, PA any of these US States were. We left that conversation alone. So we enter our room, to much dismay these "Newly renovated" rooms were probably as big as my bathroom at home. They had 2 single beds and not much room at all. So I kick back the comforter to find some lovely back hair on, what are meant to be, my clean sheets. The room was not very clean and the air-conditioning was horrible. In order to get a breeze in the room you were forced to open the window, and when you did tons of bugs crawled in…YUCK! Totally discussed I grabbed my bikini and headed to the beach, tops optional. We sit down on the lounge chairs where two G.O.’s offer us some fresh fruit, which was DELISH, unfortunately this is the only time we were served anything on the beach. Oh well, the bar was just a short walk away from the beach, no biggie. After spending all day flying and the remainder of our day relaxing on the most amazing beach I have ever laid eyes on, we are off to dinner. Unfortunately, there is so much FORCED friendliness that it just makes you sick, at first your are like "WOW, everyone is so nice and friendly and this is awesome", but by day three you try and avoid them! It's not a genuine friendliness, and is entirely forced and fake. Most of the G.O.’s are young and good looking, and word around the village is they are with a different man and women every time a new batch of G.M.’s come into the village, which is quite nasty. We head to dinner for the first time where we were forced to sit with a bunch of people we didn’t know, made me quite uneasy at first. I’m totally friendly but flying all day I just wasn’t down for the small chitchat! We were faced with the same dilemma the next morning at breakfast where we were joined by a male G.O. with the worst table manners, slurping his milk out of his bowl, flinging cereal everywhere, horrible. We ask him if he has to sit with G.M.’s at every meal, he replied "yeah and I f**king hate it. We looked at each other in dismay. I can’t say much for the dimwitted, rude staff, and their fake friendliness. Talk to one of them without their G.O. uniform on and it’s a whole other ball game! So we quickly found this quiet area out near the bar and sat there every morning for breakfast. For lunch we headed to Sharky’s (the other bar at the resort) to enjoy the live band entertainment and cold local beers! This was the most fun this pace had, the man sung both in French and English which was new and interesting to me! While listening we could see the G.O.’s practicing the acrobatics and watch daring G.M.’s test out their skill, or lack there of.
To celebrate my 24th birthday my cousin graciously purchased me an hour massage at Club Med. My massage was wonderful; it was done in a little hut overlooking the wonderful beach with the beach breeze flowing through the linen drapes, relaxing and peaceful. My massage girl was very pleasant and nice and did a fantastic job.
Club Med had its own Snorkeling boat that went out two times a day free of charge, which I enjoyed more then the afternoon ho-down that was going on pool side. They had daily "shows" with the same music over and over again. The pool definitely needed an upgrade and there was no hot tub at all. I guess this place is great if you are an old odd single person, but it definitely wasn’t my style.
The nightlife was horrible, poor taste in music (not dance music), couldn’t get the crowd dancing, the locals were more entertaining then the music, the only good part about the nightlife was the drinks were free! The whole time we had G.O.’s that were off duty talking to us just for us to get them free drinks because they have to pay. There was nothing appealing about this nightlife except the four lone slot machines hidden in the back, behind the big screen TV where me and a few of the girls found ourselves night after night with our own bottles of wine pumping endless money into these machines making our own party and enjoying ourselves!
This resort is far from luxury and not very accommodating. The G.O.’s at the help desk were not very helpful at all. They charged us $50 for late check out, our plane didn’t leave until late we had no other option but to pay it. They lost our luggage bringing it to the front for out taxi ride to the airport, they were unwilling to bring us fresh towels the last day, I guess because we were leaving. I had to hunt down housekeeping and beg for towels. My personal experience was not a good one. I don’t know if it was the mostly French crowd that was there, or the time of year we went but that resort is horrible.
The food was alright, the drinks were cold and free, the beach was topless, (no tan lines!!), the water was clear, the barracuda’s were huge, and the shells were pure white and the sun was shining! Overall Love Provo, would definitely go back but would never stay at another Club Med again in my life.