This is just an anecdote from my travels that I thought fit to share. Now, I have traveled all over the Middle East and this is the first time anything like this has ever happened to me, but I'm relating the story so that if it ever happens to you, you will know what to do.
There I was, in the courtyard of the Forty Martyrs Armenian Church in Aleppo quietly reflecting on the Armenian Genocide memorial when a discreet old man approached. "Where are you from?" He asked in Arabic. "America," I responded. He smiled, revealing a full set yellow, but surprisingly healthy teeth and asked if I would drink some tea. I politely declined, and then as Arab custom dictates, declined the next two offers. Finally, he was so insistent that I agreed. I figured that he was a guard (or similar position) at the church and actually liked the idea of sitting down and talking to someone about the Armenian community in Aleppo. As we walked out the door, however, I became a bit suspicious.
I immediately tried to rescind my acceptance, saying that I had a bus to catch because I was going back to Damascus. He said I had plenty of time and that buses leave every hour. "But..." I pleaded. I still had to go back to the hotel and I wanted to stop by the museum on my way to the station. He would give me no leave and ushered me into a coffee shop.
After the tea was ordered, he started talking. He was Iraqi, but was living in Syria now. We talked about Arabic, the U.S., places he'd traveled, all standard conversation stuff. "Maybe he does really want to just talk..." I thought to myself, but I remained suspicious.
When only a few drops of tea remained in my glass, sensing my desire to get going, he began with the story...
He had left Baghdad one year ago, paying 3,000 Euros for illegal passage into Italy, where he worked for a while, until he was discovered and forced to go back to Iraq. He escaped again, bribing the Turkish border guards to let him in. For three months he bounced around the Arabic speaking parts of Turkey (Anatakya, Iskanderun) doing odd jobs and getting by. Two weeks ago he crossed into Syria. He had yet to find a job. He was subsisting on tea and cigarettes, sometimes finding a friendly hotel owner to let him sleep on a couch, but more often sleeping on the street...
I asked the waiter for the check. He insisted on paying.
We walked towards my hotel. "I'm tired. I'm hungry. I have no place to live."
At the door of the hotel he asked if he should wait. I said no and goodbye. "But please, if you could just give something..." I don't really know why, but I wasn't in the mood for being swindled. "Something? If I had known that all you wanted was money, I would have followed you for tea!"
"But from the moment I saw you I knew that my prayers had been answered..."
"Prayers? No, I'm sorry."
"But please, I paid for the tea."
"I offered, but you refused. You invited me to tea. You paid. That's hospitality."
"But please..."
I shoved 25 lira at him. "There," I grumbled.
"But sir, the tea was..."
"Don't tell me what the tea was. Tea is never more that 25 lira. Take it."
He turned away. I went upstairs.
Now, before you think to yourself that I may be heartless and bitter, I have to explain that this man's story, although sad, was most likely not true.
First off, there were the linguistic signs. He spoke in perfect Syrian dialect, without a hint of Iraqi. If he had really arrived in Syria two weeks ago, there is no way he could speak like that. That is the equivalent of a British man coming to the U.S. and, two weeks later, speaking like a perfect American. Secondly, his clothes and general state were all too clean for someone who had been jobless for two weeks, not that that necessarily means something, but still. Also, he tried to lie about the price of tea.
And most of all, as I said, this is extremely rare behavior for the Middle East, and especially Syria. A tea invitation is an almost sacred thing, not something to be taken lightly, and certainly not a means for begging for money. Each time I related the story to a Syrian, they all agreed that there was no way the story was true, and that he was just one of the few bad Syrians who was trying to get a few dollars out of a foreigner, and telling an American a horror story from Iraq is a good way to do it.
The chances of anything like this happening to you are minimal. Syrians are some of the most friendly and hospitable people I have ever seen, and you will notice it right away. The amount of swindling that occurs is minimal compared to that in Morocco, Cairo, or Istanbul, but if anything like this does happen, don't believe the story right away, and know that even if he does buy you tea, you have NO obligation whatsoever.