on June 16, 2011
Here is the truth. If there are any 5 star reviews for this resort they are coming from either the resort employees/management or someone from kentucky that lives in a trailer. Imagine taking your significant other to a supposed tropical paradise only to find out it ended up being a run down motel 6 that has been overrun by the locals(assuming they are relatives of the employees/entertainment). The room smelled like piss and the A/C would barely work. When we turned on the hot tub outside the room it made green bubbles. We asked if they could put some chlorine in and they said they don't use it!?We have been to other resorts in Jamaica and the food selection was limited at Hedo and not very good. I actually was not able completely chew up the prime rib and swallow it because of all the gristle. For anyone in the lifestyle of swinging they know what it is like to go to a party and have bunch of single weenies hanging around creepin. That is the main flavor of this resort - the singles out number the couples on an average week and they are about 97% men. Most of the couples that were there were naturalist-not swingers. For those that do not know this there is a huge difference. Naturalists usually do not swing and are very clicky with the groups that they travel with. This will make it very awkward if you are there to have "fun" not wanting to offend anyone you are going to see for the entire week. The beach peddlers are bad in Jamaica but the employees on the resort are actually more of a concern. They hang around outside the doors of your room waiting to "score". Friends of ours had a situation a few years back where an employee followed her into the restroom and the husband found him trying to corner her in the stall. He left the guy laying on the bathroom floor and notified the management. The entertainment reminded us of a scene from the movie Idiocracy. They brought a series of black men out in a weird WWF style introduction that were supposed to be strippers. Most of them spent there limelight dry humping the floor with banana hammocks on. They would also prove there manhood by bringing women members of the audience on stage and show how many positions they could have sex by demonstrating(we are sure that was for later possibilities-lol). There were no women strippers which was a huge disappointment . More of less the whole thing was a sausage fest that made you want to carry a can of mace as you hurried your way back to your room. Many of the decorations/structures around the resort were broken,rotted or outdated. Our main gripe with the resort is that Apple Vacations considered this a 4 star resort when it is actually a 2 star. If you read all the reviews seriously you know that is not the truth.
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