This was to be our first visit to the famed mecca of outlandishly beautiful people. Research revealed to us that the South Beach hedonists are just getting started when the rest of the world sleeps. What would there be for me, an early bird of average appearance for whom the term "clubbing" refers to a beating? Not for me the loud rambuncious crowds along Ocean Boulevard, I thought. Not for me the shops on Lincoln Road selling hankies being passed off as dresses.

Or so I thought. As I so often do when travelling to places very different from my uptight, conservative northeastern roots, I found myself loosening up, going with the flow. Such feelings of freedom (of expression, of movement, of dress) are essentially what attract me to places in the southern climes.

Which is not to say that I went to clubs and stayed up late. But my visit did prove to me that there's more to a place than meets the eye; that a reputation doesn't have to precede your destination.

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Our street-side Executive Suite (studio) was an enormous 600 sq ft with two king-size beds covered with down-filled comforters. Extra pillows and blankets were found in the walk-in closet, along with a safe and cotton robes.

A work desk with leather chair and fax machine divided the room from the kitchen area, which had a sink, coffee maker and mugs. No refrigerator. The bathroom, while small compared to the rest of the room, came supplied with wonderful oatmeal soaps, shampoo and conditioner.

One morning my coffee mug slipped out of my hand and shattered on the floor. Housekeeping came right away to sweep up the mess and replace the broken mug. They were equally responsive when we needed a new lightbulb.

Renovations were complete in the major guest areas, though there was still work to be done on unfettered access to the pool and the ocean. To get to the pool, guests must pass through many public areas, and to get to the beach, we had to walk around the building. We were assured that these were temporary measures (hence the introductory rate).

The pool area affords wonderful views of the ocean, comfortable deck chairs (in the sun or shaded by canopies), towels, and two hot tubs. Bar and meal service was also provided. The private beach has chairs and cabanas, and attendants provide towels to guests. But don''t try to hang out here if you''re not a guest because the attendants do come around with a hotel guest list to check your name!

We were within walking distance of many restaurants, and had no difficulty walking to Lincoln Road, though we did catch a bus to take us further south to Ocean Boulevard. There are bus stops all along Collins Ave. and just about all of them will take you to the restaurants, shops and clubs of South Beach.

I absolutely loved this place and got quite a kick out of living in such luxury and glamour for a couple of days. I was lucky to have landed the introductory rates, as I just looked up December ''02 rack rates and they''ve creeped up a bit to $219, which seems about right, though I have no idea what these types of places usually go for.

Castillo del Mar is a condo/resort complex harboring a mix of cultures. Spanish is the language of choice; many of the stores in the lobby level are not bilingual, including the salon where I attempted to make a manicure appointment. No worries here, however – with a combination of pantomime and assistance from an English-speaking client mid-coif, we were able to get me on the books for later that day. Boyphoenix got his first pedicure here!

There were also many Hassidim, with their beards and black hats. We stayed during Passover, and the resort offered special packages for their kosher guests, even providing a special Shabbos elevator, stopping at every floor so observers wouldn’t have to push the buttons.

I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were the only hotel guests; that all of the other folks riding up and down in the elevators, sitting by the pool, heading to the beach, were all residents. They just seemed so "dug in," whereas I felt so temporary.

While Boyphoenix napped, I took a stroll north on Collins Ave, hoping to find something interesting. No such luck. This part of Miami Beach harbors nothing but high-rise hotels and condos; fortresses against the oceanfront. Lots of construction and renovation was going on, but not a shop or store in sight. I spied some restaurants in other hotels, but after walking for 20 minutes I''d seen enough so headed back to the hotel for some poolside lounging and reading.

The pool area is not attended, though there is a tiki bar where one can purchase cheap eats and a cold one. There is also a tennis court and a bikini clad man baking in the sun. Passage to the private beach is through a locked gate, a key for which can be borrowed from the front desk but must be returned when you come in from the beach. At any rate, the beach has no chairs or umbrellas. No towel service. But the ocean''s surf does crash satisfactorily against the beach. There''s something about the ocean...

Overall, I recommend this place if you want to plant yourself in one spot and not have to move. Eat in the tiki bar, or take out from the convenience store. Lounge by the pool or on the beach and take in the mix of people who come and go. Undoubtedly the most unusual mix I’ve ever seen. Not to mention a great buy at $75 a night – in December.