One Pigeon in Pigeon Forge

The best thing to do in Pigeon Forge is to act like a kid again. Race your friends in go-karts around the spiral towers. There are plenty of speedways to chose from. Play with that special someone a round of mini golf, cheating by tossing the ball in the hole when they're not looking. Eat until you feel like you'll explode at Old Mill Square Restaurant. Most of all, you've got to check out Dollywood. It's a sight every vacation here needs to be complete. The most memorable part of the trip was outracing the boys in my go-kart. I drove very well like a pro, not bumping into anything or anyone. And I haven't even gotten my driver's license or taken a class!

Quick Tips:

Wherever you go in Pigeon Forge, you will find coupons. The businesses help each other out by advertising from gas stations to restaurants to golf and go-kart areas. There is also a tourist center along the Parkway. When I first went there, their sense of direction was traffic light number "this" and traffic Light number "that". The streets on the long strip, or parkway, have lights with numbers. This is how you learn to use their system of directions.

Best Way To Get Around:

There are two ways to get around. Driving and walking. At night, even in the evening, people are walking up and down the Parkway.

"The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page." ~St. Augustine

When we finally found the office, we were given a map that went into a small subdivision of cabins, large houses, and steep hills. When we knew where the cabin was, I was amazed to find that it was on a street with other houses. On the website, it looked as though it was secluded.

There was a wooden rocking chair and swing on the porch. Inside, you walked into a staircase leading up to a second floor, a living room, and a kitchen. There are plenty of cabins, and the one we stayed in was Cabin 4. We were able to fit twelve people into two bedrooms, the sofa was a pull out, and three air matresses.

The back of the cabin went down a hill, where a porch and Jacuzzi was. There was also a community pool in the middle of the area. You could go underneath the hill to see a basement that was under the Jacuzzi--also to scare the daylights out of your friends in the Jacuzzi.

"But when the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface." ~ Mark Twain

There are many reasons why I love Old Mill Square. The salt-and-pepper shakers are in the shape of bears. The food is limitless, to where you really say "I'm full!" Also, we had a new waiter who started that week whose name is Aaron. He was so sweet and efficient, and you'll get no complaints from me.

Old Mill Square is a Southern-style restaurant that has a friendly atmosphere as you walk up ramps to get to the entrance. The Mill is the most photographed in the country, being listed on the National Register of Historic Places. There were shops surrounding the restaurant, such as a bakery café, creamery, general store with a tour, candy kitchen, and pottery store.

I never thought I could be so full in my life. You order one thing for an expensive price and wind up getting two things extra that come prior to the meal. They serve burgers, chicken, and biscuits and have a children’s menu. The biscuits are to die for! Serving over 600,000 hungry visitors a year, this restaurant is certainly not to be missed.

"Rice is born in water and must die in wine." ~ Italian Proverb

The Backstage Restaurant gives the atmosphere of being backstage in a theater. An eagle quilt is hung on the wall, an old-time piano sits quietly along the wall, and doors that have lash lines, props, and costumes are all around. Pictures of bands and musical people, such as Toby Keith, Restless Heart, Randy Travis, and others, bring the wall to life.

The best spot in the house is near a window. The second window table from the eagle quilt is my recommended spot for those who love to watch the people outside, young and old, enjoying their time in Dollywood. The view is across the paved path of Name Rings Shop and a gazebo with souvenirs and gifts that sells sunglasses. The gazebo is a charming yellow one with red-and-white trims.

Meals are $12, plus tax. The staff enjoys and loves where they work. Refills are free. The food is great. It is the best place to eat instead of partaking in the greasy and expensive food displayed in the park. If you walk past the restaurant, just look for the vintage tea hybrid roses that are named after Dolly Parton herself and pink parasols.

"A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song." ~Chinese Proverb

If you go past Dollywood to Dollywood's Splash Country, the traffic light you come to is where you turn to find Mc Carter Hollow Road. Parrot Mountain is a colorful display of fouls in a lush, green sancuary. When you drive up the steep road, (and I mean steep because you're climbing a mountain), you see a unique English cottage and statues of marble angels holding a torch on marble stairs.

There are many varieties of birds there. An Eclectus Parrot is a red and purple bird that makes a sound like someone is falling. A Greenwinged Macaw has some green on its large red wings. There is also the Blue and Gold Macaw. The cute little Sun Conures are rainbow colors and float around their cages. Besides macaws, there are toucans, cockatoos, and the Amboina King Parrot, whose existence is threatened. Then there's the Lory Aviatory, with the small birds that perch on your head and shoulders.

There is a tropical bird petting area, but some birds do bite. Warning signs on the cages warn which do bite. They're open in rain or shine. And if it rains, there's always a large fern near the Lory Aviatory that can provide shelter from the rain. You can also call and ask for rates at 865/774-1749.

"A lake is the landscape's most beautiful and expressive feature. It is earth's eye; looking into which the beholder measures the depth of his own nature." ~Henry David Thoreau

Dollywood's Splash Country is adjacent to Dollywood. Voted Best New Water Park in 2001 by World Water Park Assn., the park is a place for good times with the family. You're greeted by a large waterfall surrounded by lush flora when you enter the park. You can pose for a picture to be picked up afterward when you leave.

What I was impressed with is that there is a system called Safe Zone that is the latest in tracking security that comes as a bracelet for you and your children if you get separated. There are stations around the park that can scan the bracelet to show where your children or you are.

The Riverside Trading Post is where you can find swimwear, beach towels, and even suncreen if you forget it. I recommend that you put on plenty of sun tan lotion and repeatedly put it on because I have an aching sunburn on the back of my shoulders from not applying. There's also the Campsite Grill which has expensive food and long lines to wait, so I'd also eat first.

"If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt." ~ Dean Martin

If you head south of the parkway in Piegon Forge, you'll come to a strange farm. Old MacDonald had a farm with animals, and now it has been turned into a mini-golf course. There are flying pigs, cats drinking milk, and cows mooing. Pigs are jumping off a diving board into a lake where a duck is lazily floating on an inner tube. It is Ripley's, so you really have to see it to believe it.

You can chose from four 18-hole courses and can play as many times as you want. This is also an opportunity to meet many new people who are also on vacation. I met a woman who was from Mississippi. You can also find local teens who go on dates here. Mondays and weekends are always busy with traffic.

I'm okay when it comes to golf. When I was little, I couldn't hit the ball. I'd throw the ball and hope I'd make it in. I scored a hole-in-one at one course. I'm surprised I got that. Also, keep track of your ball. There are areas where you hit your ball into a waterfall, and if you're a small child, you'll throw it in the wrong one and lose your ball. This happened to my little cousin, who just closed her eyes; grinned, showing her teeth; and looked innocent as I got the ball from underneath the waterfall's bridge.

"You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive." ~ Author Unknown

Adventure Raceway has bumper boats, a go-kart track, an arcade, and a mini-golf course. I waited until the guys who worked there told me to go to a front car. I fastened the seat belt over my shoulders, then noticed I had my purse between my legs. I had better not loose it, I thought. I later noticed that the car was starting to move, so I pushed the left pedal, which was the brake. The man said to have a great ride and go!

I took off like a shooting star. A boy passed me after the third solo loop around a spiral tower. I got ahead of him when he must have crashed with a guy who worked there helping him. The guy's eyes widened when I came this way, so I tilted the wheel, going around him, hitting 50 miles per hour. Half the time I was holding on with one hand. A hill was on the track, which was a big surprise when I saw a large dip! I loved the ride and the rush of excitement as I sped down another tower. There was the feeling of butterflies rolling around in your stomach as you dropped down the hill.

I didn't get hit by anyone, nor did I hit them or the railing. I consider the many years of playing Cruising USA video game as part of my training. I admit that I even hummed "Born to Be Wild" as I pressed the gas pedal coming down the tower. It was an experience I enjoyed and wouldn't mind doing again. And I didn't loose my purse.

"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde." ~ Dolly Parton

I have made a list of things to see and do in Dollywood:
1. Thunderhead Roller Coaster. Wooden coasters are my favorite. I was also thrilled to know you rode on the side but didn't tip over.
2. Chasing Rainbows: The Dolly Parton Story. This displays pictures, dresses, and even Dolly's attic.
3. Rockin' Roadway, where you drove a Cadillac while Elvis sang about his "blue suede shoes."
4. Smoky Mountains River Rampage promises you will get wet, and you do happen to float toward a waterfall that no matter what side you are on will get wet.
5.Feed huge (I mean huge!) fish near the Apple Jack's Sandwich Shop. I'm not kidding - they're huge.
6. The Southern Gospel Music Hall of Fame and Museum to see interactive dummies sing the scales, pictures of Dolly, and other gospel bands.
7. Dollywood Express. Don't sit on the sides, because you will get soot from the train that uses coal.
8. Backstage Restaurant. This is the best place to eat in all of Dollywood. This elegant, bang-for-your-buck restaurant fills you up and provides an atmosphere as though you are backstage. Meals are $12 and less.
9.Star Walk and Friendship Garden has beautiful flora and names on a brick path to the Backstage Restaurant. Marie Osmond is a name you'll be likely to see.
10. See the preservation of crafts in the Craftsman's Village. Glass-blowers, a blacksmith, and much more awaits.

"Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage. Lettuce pray." ~ Author Unknown

We collected coupons at every place we went to before stopping at Pizza Planet, which looks like the place off of the movie "Toy Story." There was a pizza buffet for $5.99 with a salad bar. The pizza was kind of greasy, but tasted good.

I think we got the coupons at Old Mill Square. Since the restaurant is popular, lots of people like to advertise their brochures there. The mechanical bull was near the buffet, as well as a large arcade of games. With the coupon, we got into Blacklight Mini Golf. The fluorescent light made the lint from your shirt show, whites become luminous, and the ball glow-in-the-dark.

Through the bright terrain of this 18-hole mini-golf course, which goes upstairs, your golfing skills will be tested. You can also listen to music like 98 Degrees' "Because I Want It All." What was so funny is that if you're playing with someone who hasn't done it in a white, you can sing, "Because I want it all. You can't hit the ball!"