How to Survive Tel-Aviv, Israel !

Suk-a-Carmel Market

It’s the one of the stinkiest place on earth to visit! It smells like rotting corpses in the sun, the flies swam over the produce and people everywhere, and the poultry and meats are in the open air! You know you’ve entered an unsafe area when you see the slimy streets ahead. All the streets are slippery and smelly, and the vendors look like beggars! Don’t eat or buy anything from a street vendor there -- you will regret it, as I did! Remember, hospital and doctors cost an arm and leg there, and US insurance is no good overseas. Don’t buy anything in the stall, or you’ll wish you hadn’t -- the merchandise is the cheapest and worst-made, lowest quality of all. The good stuff is exported, and only the second-quality leftovers are sold in Israel to the general public! It's stuff that falls apart sooner than you can get it home, and there is no BBB/customer service or warranties to help! You're on your own there: "Buyers Beware!"

One day while I was shopping in the Shuk-a-Carmel market, I ran into a knife fight between two workers, customers, and owners. One of the knife-wielding men tried to use me as shield. I was between two of them, and he lunged and missed me by inches! They were arguing over price cuts, another vendor later told me. They are common occurrences, I am told. In the summer months, when it’s hot, tempers flare easily -- another reason for avoiding the open markets there!

Quick Tips:

Starting with the smelly sidewalks, the poop and piss is everywhere. It's hard not to step in it! Bad food in the markets adds to the smells that overwhelm your senses. I gagged when I went to the poultry area -- the stench was overwhelming. It’s so rancid there, it took my breath away! I had more diarrhea there than in any other country I’ve visited thusfar in the Middle East.

Best Way To Get Around:

Well, I rent a car or go by taxi, as buses are still the favorite target of PLO!

One staff member was especially rude to me, telling me one rate and charging me another! Each month he would charge me another day for my stay with him, even though we had a contract with him for month to month. He changed the rules every time I saw him to pay the rent for my stay. I was there for 3 months and felt as thought I had been there much longer, seeing the worst sides the people had to show.

Most of the apartments and hotels were, to say the least, rat and roach traps. On many occasions, I awoke to go to toilet and heard crunching under my feet and found, in the morning, huge crushed roaches all over the floor! To my horror, there were rats the size of kittens in the hallways in the early morning running up and down the stairs! Most of the places to stay at are little more than rundown roach-infested rat traps. This is my own first-hand account of my experiences. Dizengoff center and its hotels and apartments should be avoided for health reasons, if for no other reason! AVOID THE KDA APARTMENTS! Older looking Holiday Apartments Studios & Suites (Comparable to a 1-star Hotel) for short and long term rentals. Two older buildings with water damage, mold & cracks in walls on buildings on each side of Dizengoff Circle! Owner is a real wise guy, beware if he knows know you have money he will stick it too you. He especially does it to Americans! I should KNOW he’s done it to me twice now! Over charging is his way of doing business!

Best Things Nearby:
I suggest staying in one of the bed-and-breakfasts, which are a step up! They are starting to pop up all over the country nowadays!

Best Things About the Resort:
The locals are never happier than when their pockets are full of your money! And never sadder than when it is not full of your money!

Resort Experience:
Israel today is a country in decay-the buildings are literally falling into the streets, as I had many chunks fall on my head! Cracks are in the floor walls and ceiling of many hotels. When I speak of cracks, I mean big enough to see inside the walls in some cases! My shower literally sweated water into my bedroom, pealing off the paint as it went . . . I had roaches crawling up the pipes into my bathroom at night and hiding under the toilet lids, so it good for men to put up the toilet lids.

Some of the places listed on the web are converted apartments that have been chopped up to maximize profit. My toilet and shower were on the balcony-I kid you know! Part of the ceiling in my bathroom fell down one night! It tilted as if it would fall off after the small earthquake this summer I experienced there! These are the worst places to stay! So beware and check out your accommodations before you pay.

One of the most dangerous of all the things I found out was the toxic mold in the showers, which was black and insidious looking and made me so ill that I had to leave Israel to save my life from it. Doctors and hospital are way too expensive there. I am still recovering from that danger to my health.

• Unit Type: Studio
• Activities: Not Available
• Amenities: Not Available
• Unit Satisfaction: Poor
• Family Friendliness: Poor
• Service: Not Available

The poor-quality food and the worst service, added to the crookedness of the shopkeepers, makes for a poor impression. Don’t eat or buy anything from a street vendor, as you will regret it. Remember that hospitals and doctors cost an arm and leg, and US insurance is no good overseas! Don’t buy anything in the stall, or you’ll wish you hadn’t -- the merchandise is the cheapest and worst-made, lowest quality of all. The good stuff is exported, and only the second-quality leftovers are sold in Israel to the general public.

The biggest mistake any man can make in Israel is to date an Israeli! Why, you may ask? Well, they use you up and throw you away just as quickly. Take it from me -- it happens all the time. They find some guy and get out of him everything they can, then go after another one! They are consummate liars; they cheat on you and use up all your money just as fast! After it is all said and done, they look for the next party guy to give them thrills. They always want more, they're never happy with you, and it always has to be more of everything! They always have this pride in themselves that they’re too good for you, or so they think. They're always looking for a rich man and a lover on the side, just like the soap opera in US they model themselves after! He's always got to be more handsome or have a heart they can manipulate to do their bidding!

If you’re gay, this is the place to be, as they dominate the scene with their clubs and bars. There are stories in The Jerusalem Post newspaper about the clubs’ nightly performances! I personally avoided these places, though public spectacles have been made in front of me from time to time! I would say they’re as open as, or more so than, San Francisco or Honolulu or Bangkok, places I have visited in the past.