The Shadier Side of the Valley of the Sun

This hotel is located very close to the airport…a deduction of proximity can be made from the name of the hotel itself. A couple of minutes after you retrieve your luggage from the airport carousel, you can be basking in the glory of your very own room at the Hampton Inn; the ride to and from the airport is courtesy of the hotel.

The facility is located directly across the street from the Chinese Cultural Center. This center is huge and provides to you anything Chinese, to include food and shopping. The exterior of the building is highlighted by traditional Chinese gardens complete with replicas of pagodas and statues. The Hampton does offer a "Romance Package" for those of you attempting to impress your lover with a Jacuzzi room. For the rest of us, we can enjoy a standard room complete with refrigerator, microwave, coffee maker, hair dryer and ironing tools. There is also a guest laundry room on the premises just in case. For the technologically savvy, 2 phone lines and a data port are provided (no wireless capabilities yet). There are meeting rooms/classrooms available to seat as many as 50 people. The business traveler would find this hotel very centrally located and convenient for a small group of individuals to meet and not be distracted with the trappings that a luxurious facility would offer.

The rates are also pretty reasonable. Peak season rates range from $89 to $120, while a bargain price range of $59 to $89 are available during the harsh summer months (pack a swimming suit and not much else). Enjoy the swimming pool, whirlpool and fitness room during the day and head out to Old Town Scottsdale, Camelback Corridor, Bank One Ballpark, ASU, America West Arena, the Phoenix Zoo or the Botanical Gardens after you are well rested. All of these locations are within 10 to 20 minutes of the Hampton Inn.

Upon arrival, a group of very friendly personnel will assist you at the Days Inn lobby. No, I am not referring to the “Ladies of the Night” that call Van Buren Street home. Rather, I am impressed with the staff that is gainfully—and legitimately—employed by the hotel. This friendly service is perhaps the best thing this place has going for it. As aforementioned, the hotel sits squarely in the center of “prostitute pass” (this is the name with which I personally baptized the area. This is not common nomenclature; so do not ask for directions referencing the “pass”. Your request will be met with odd looks and much head scratching). There are classroom, banquet, and theater style facilities on the property that could inspire the business traveler. With the hotel location so close to the airport, it is very convenient to travel to the area hot spots. The Days Inn does provide free shuttle services to the airport, a few local restaurants, and the Banc One Ballpark. Also, all of the poolside hotel rooms, the Conference Center, Spinner’s Diner and lobby of the hotel allow for high-speed wireless internet connection. (Turns out that the second story of the Days Inn proves to be the “cheap seats” and tough luck getting a wireless connection. The second story residence can head poolside for this added feature and convenience). The previously mentioned restaurant, Spinner’s Diner & Lounge is a 50’s style diner that in just off of the hotel lobby. It is open during normal business hours for convenient grazing-on-the-run. While at the Days Inn you may swim in the heated pool and spa or work that body in the on-grounds facility that is available for use by guests 24 hours a day. During the peak season (fall & winter for the rest of America) the room rates for a standard double are $89 to $109, and during the blistering summer one can stay at the Days Inn for $44 to $59. Based on the room rates, I would suggest that a different hotel location would be more suitable to most visitors. However, if you are an avid dog-racing fan, the dog track is within walking distance from the hotel lobby! Good Luck and Godspeed!

The Holiday Inn Select boasts the closest hotel to the airport. Now, I cannot be sure that this is an accurate statement as I do not travel with any kind of measuring device—one bad experience with a man who was "measurement challenged" and I vowed to keep the measuring tape at home—but I will take their word for it. The hotel is all of 2 minutes from the Phoenix Airport terminals and unlike most of its neighboring hotels, actually has more than two floors. Therefore, if you ask for a room in one of the higher floors, you could have a nice view of The Valley. This facility is one of the nicer airport-convenient hotel locations and they even have plans to upgrade the color scheme and décor in 2004. This change should put them head and shoulders above their immediate competition (geographically speaking).

There are two locations within the building that offer spirits and cuisine. The Flying Cactus Steak & Grill as well as the Vertigo Lounge can offer some meals and drinks to keep you fat and sassy during your stay. Like every other hotel in Phoenix, one can enjoy the pool and spa that will heat to a cool 98 degrees during the summertime (one can participate in some regression therapy while lounging in the pool…a good therapist can take you all the way back to time spent in the womb since the pool temperature will be consistent with that of your mother’s amniotic fluid). There are also many banquet, meeting and classroom options and a ballroom that can accommodate up to 600 people. Catering, wedding and holiday party menus can be obtained for groups of all sizes. For rates that start at $89, the stay will include parking, airport transportation, rooms stocked with hair dryers and ironing stations, 2 phone lines with modem & dataport connection and the recent addition of high-speed internet access. As previously stated, this is one of the better options if your stay in Phoenix is short and sweet. The location, the in-house dining, and the ample meeting rooms make it perfect for a small business meeting place. Do not expect a "Star-Sighting" as this hotel would not be considered high-end, but you will not be bothered with some of the riff-raff that can be found in a lesser hotel in the immediate area.

Located 2 miles from the airport, the La Quinta Inn is convenient. However, I don’t think that it is merely coincidence that the address is 911 South 48th Street. Emergency services may be needed to resurrect this facility. In order to attract guests, they offer complementary continental breakfast and airport transportation. They also boast movies on demand, Nintendo and data port phones in each room. The La Quinta graciously allows for small domestic animals. You need not worry about any urine or fecal matter left behind by these furry travelers, the human remains will be more overwhelming and unsanitary if I were guessing.

The standard outdoor swimming pool is upgraded with heating. Just off the pool is the "Fitness Center". This is marketing at its finest as the fitness center is actually room 104 gutted with a couple of machines thrown in to confuse the senses. Better than nothing I suppose, but bring your Lysol as my supposition is that the cleaning lady may not have been by #104 in quite some time. This is strictly a guess and I would not want to be quoted, so leave my name out of any and all litigation!

The room rates for the La Quinta are on par with the other hotels located in the airport area. Peak rates run anywhere from $80 to $120 a night. Off-peak season rates range from $60 to $90. Staying in the La Quinta does offer very convenient access to many of the local attractions that would bring a traveler to the Phoenix area. This fact is probably what keeps the facility in business. Location, location, location!

Apparently, at the Hawthorn Suites, every day is Bring-Your-Child-to-Work Day. The front desk is manned by a young mother and her toddler. This allows the visitor to observe multi-tasking at its best. Between directions to your room and the pool, you may witness a scalding or two. Obviously, I say this tongue in cheek. I am fairly certain that this babysitting routine happens fairly infrequently, my timing may have just been perfect and it was only a one-time thing….RIGHT!

Although this facility is not a five star location, it is nice—relatively speaking. All of the rooms are suites and provide refrigerators, wet bar (a.k.a. sink), and microwaves. Some rooms house a small kitchen. With the peak rates ranging from $99 to $129 and the off peak rates from $59 to $89, this proves to be a fairly cost-efficient option. With the price of the room comes continental breakfast every morning. If you are one of the lucky visitors staying over on a Wednesday, you can participate in the Wednesday "Social". The Social allows one to enjoy complementary dinner and soda.

This facility was really designed around the business traveler who is staying in Tempe anywhere from a night to a month. There is 24-hour access to the pool, whirlpool and fitness room. Each room is appointed with a desk, voice & data phone lines and personalized voice mail. There is a guest laundry room and same-day dry cleaning services offered. The hotel is located 2 to 12 miles from popular locations such as Banc One Ball Park, America West Arena, Baseball Spring Training stadiums, ASU, and many restaurants and shopping mall facilities. All things considered, this is a fine option for a traveler who is combining a bit of work with an equal supply of play.

Ah…what’s in a name? This question has been pondered by much wiser minds than this author; however, it is a question worthy of reflection. Where the Ramada Limited is concerned, the name says it all. Tranquility, relaxation, romance, cleanliness, and ambiance are all severely LIMITED at this Ramada. The drive from the airport to the Ramada Limited will offer such beautiful sights as the plentiful trailer parks just walking distance from your hotel room. Also the traveler can bask in the vast vacant lots that surround the building itself. Sweet success is realized when you visit this well-appointed hovel (or is that the sweet aroma of dirty socks?).

One will exult in glorious pride when taking advantage of the myriad accommodations that the Ramada provide: in-room coffee, free local calls, AM/FM clock radio, free USA Today Newspaper, VCR player rentals, HBO1 & 2, and the piéce de résistance….fax services available.

To be sure, this hotel will provide the most basic of amenities, but that is precisely what some travelers want. If one is traveling across country and just needs a place to lay their weary head, this is the spot. If you are staying the night and want a good deal, rates here start at $44, and the employees show strong signs of a willingness to "deal". If you can provide the reservation specialist with a reasonable target cost-per-night, they will most likely be able to accommodate. This is a strong bonus under the right traveling circumstances.

We can’t all afford five star facilities. And there are some who can afford plush resorts but the travel plans do not call for such excess. For these travelers, the Ramada Limited is a perfect choice. Stanch bellmen, sniveling concierge nor a customer relations rep will disturb your nights sleep here.

This Travelodge is located in the heart of the East Valley, making it very conveniently located to some desirable destinations. An easy drive from the airport, the Travelodge is also close to ASU, Phoenix Zoo and Botanical Gardens, casinos, malls, theaters and several golf courses (then again, EVERYTHING in Phoenix is located near several golf courses).

This is your bare bones kind of hotel that offers just the essentials. Room rates reflect the limited number of amenities and start at just $41. This makes the Travelodge a cost effective alternative to the high-end hotels and resorts in the area. Unfortunately, you always get what you pay for. The rooms come with limited bragging rights. Standard in-room coffee, morning newspaper delivery, HBO/ESPN/CNN cable stations and access to two pools are included in the room rate.

There are plentiful discounts that may be taken advantage of to further the cost-savings that the Travelodge affords. Among other discounts, you may qualify to take advantage of the student or senior rates, or discounts associated with military service and AAA membership.

Relative to the other hotels in the immediate area, this one ranks well among the "budget" hotels. Its cleanliness, friendly staff and great location make it a solid choice amongst the fiscally conscience traveler.

Here is another cookie-cutter airport hotel for the taking. Nothing fancy, nothing fabulous. Just the essentials: roof, bed, sink, toilet, shower. This hotel does suffer a bit from the stiff competition along the short stretch of 47th Place road. From the airport, it is a quick five-minute trip—specifically it is 3 miles from the tarmac. Once you are on 47th Place road, you meet the Hilton, Courtyard Marriott, and Fairfield Inn before arriving at the Sleep Inn. All four of these hotels are within spitting distance from one another. Based on the condition of this facility in comparison to the other three, this would be my fourth choice in travel destinations.

Rates are standard and range from $79 to $99 during the peak season. Off peak season rates are only $49 to $55. What does this get you? Typical and basic amenities: shuttle service to/from the airport, pool & spa, fax & copy services, etc. Each room is equipped with the in-room tri-fecta: hair dryer, ironing center and coffee maker (YAWN).

The main redeeming quality that the Sleep Inn has is the location that it provides. However, every other airport hotel can boast the same convenience. So why stay at the Sleep Inn? Maybe you have a frequent flyer program or awards program that will allow you to stay for free. In that case, this place is money!

Here is a facility that harkens back to the good old days of two-level motels. The exterior of the building gives away nothing. You could be looking at virtually any downtown building in Anywhere, USA. There are storefront windows that have bee blacked out as to not see inside. On the other side of these windows are the several banquet rooms, meeting rooms, and ball rooms that are housed in the facility. Nearly every one of the 163 rooms faces the courtyard and pool area. The exterior paint is the same faded pink that can be found throughout the vast expanse of the Phoenix metro area.

The rooms are surprisingly spacious and the staff takes great pride in pointing out that there is new carpet as well as new bathtubs in all of the rooms. Get there before the soiling begins, folks; his is your one shot at truly clean carpet in a hotel room.

As previously mentioned, there is ample meeting space in the hotel—8000 square feet of it to be exact. Because there is an on-site restaurant—Cricket’s Restaurant & Lounge— any meetings on the premises can take advantage of the food services. There are Business Class rooms available with a work desk. All rooms include high-speed internet, data port phones and voicemail. For these standard rooms, you will spend $109 to $129 during peak season and $59 to $89 for the off peak times of the year.

This hotel is located in downtown Phoenix so guests can actually walk to many attractions. Civic Center Plaza, Arizona Science Center, AMC Movieplex, Dodge Theatre, Banc One Ballpark, America West Arena and many nice restaurants can be reached by foot—who needs workout facilities! The short 10-minute drive from the airport makes this spot a real winner. I would recommend this location to any traveler who is looking to get to Phoenix without breaking the bank.