Le Meridien and Limassol - Just Don't!!

Going home; getting out of the hotel ASAP in order to get some reasonably priced food and drink in Limassol town.

Quick Tips:

If I were to return to Cyprus (unlikely, but I’m sure there must be nice bits I haven't seen, and the people were VERY friendly and hospitable), I'd get the cheapest possible accommodation, a hire car, and find my own nice places . . . whatever you do, stay away from the "package" destinations!

Best Way To Get Around:

Driving is easy, and local buses are good and cheap.

Deep breath . . . I have a million little gripes about this place and it takes the prize for the worst value for money of anywhere I’ve been. I paid about £850 to SHARE a room for 5 nights, with half board and a couple of spa treatments thrown in.

First the good point: the staff. Universally lovely, helpful, and really tried hard . . . but couldn't make up for the rest of the place.

This is listed as a 5* plus "luxury" resort. The hotel as you approach it is a 70s style concrete monstrosity, kind of like something you might stay in at an airport. It is situated on a v small, grey, scrubby beach with lovely views over a power plant. The rooms inside are nicely furnished (recently re-done) and the bathrooms good, but not at all outstanding for the price -- cheap toiletries, no film channels on the TV, extortionate mini bar etc). At the time we went, the whole of the grounds almost were a building site, as the refurbishment was running 4 months late but they hadn't given us the option to cancel.

Second big gripe: RIP OFF policies at every turn. Even the small bottles of water in the mini bar were about 5 times more expensive than in the town (at a "luxury" property you normally get mineral water free), the lunch food was vastly overpriced and motorway service station quality, and because the hotel was a good half hour by bus away from anywhere else, you have no other options. Dinner was very average but very pretentiously described and served; a major source of amusement was trying to guess which elements of the dish as described on the menu would be left out, as nothing ever turned up exactly as advertised. Also despite being on half board we were still charged for every single drink (oh yes, even the water again, and tea or coffee) with the meals. The place had all the charm and atmosphere of a morgue -- huge empty spaces with piped music playing, and our other fellow guests seemed to be either locals with hundreds of kids, god alone knows how they afforded it, or rich Russians there to use the spa. Oh and Uri Geller was at breakfast one morning.

We did use the spa, and the treatments were fairly good (except the Indian Head Massage, which just involves getting your hair smothered in oil, yuck, and did nothing for me) but again very expensive for what you got compared with the UK.

Beware: although the brochures and advertising for this place talk about many eating options (seven, I believe), most of them are closed in the off-season (roughly May to September), but this isn't mentioned anywhere. Consequently when we got there in April, we had ONE dining option for lunch, and one and a half for dinner (we could have used the lunch place, but this was only burger and salad type stuff done badly so not very tempting).

First, the "French" restaurant in the main hotel. Dinner was very average, but very pretentiously described and served. The accompanying vegetables would be identical whatever you ordered, and got very dull after the third night. No sign at all of all the lovely local produce we saw in the markets at Limassol. Dessert was of the rather elaborate, but tasting of plastic foam variety I'd not enjoyed in bad B&B's in England 10 years ago. Also despite being on half board we were still charged for every single drink (oh yes, even the water again, and tea or coffee) with the meals, which ran up quite a bill because we REALLY NEEDED that wine or beer!

Lunch in the casual bistro: a major source of amusement was trying to guess which elements of the dish as described on the menu would be left out, as nothing ever turned up exactly as advertised. When we requested the missing items we were met with a degree of incomprehension and hostility. Standard of food (pizzas, burgers and salad type stuff) was very slightly better than that offered by motorway service stations in the UK.

Limassol itself is quite a nice place to pass a couple of hours. Look hard enough and there are some nice cafes, also a reasonably large market selling lovely local fruit and veg. Best of all, though, are the shops selling designer copy handbags, etc. or the genuine article, at excellent prices.

This is worth a look if you've time to kill. The folk art is interesting (includes costumes, tapestries, etc.), but more so is the restored typical cypriot house that it's housed in, which is fun to look around.

Weather isn't guaranteed except in the summer months. We went in April expecting 20 degrees plus, but actually it rained and was about 15 degrees most of the week. Everyone kept telling us it was "most unusual," but I’ve heard the same thing in many parts of the Mediterranean (Greece, Canary Islands, etc.), so maybe I’m just unlucky! I'd say though, if you want really guaranteed sunshine outside of May-Sept, go farther south.