The Gringa Who Ate Vallarta

In the entries that follow the number indicates the section of town: 1 - marina area, 2 - hotel zone, 3 - in town, north of Cuale, 4 - south of Cuale.

Quick Tips:

Service on the beach - Cuates y Cuetes, El Farallon Burro Bar

Music with dinner - Cuates y Cuetes, Bodeguita del Medio

Mexican food - Los Milagros, Las Cazuelas

Asian - Archis Wok, Susie Wong's

Seafood - Filos, Seafare, El Coleguita (in Ixtapa, north of town)

Vegetarian - Planeta Vegetariano

Ethnic - Karpathos (Greek) Bodeguita del Medio (Cuban)

24 Hour - Rico Mac Taco, El Jacal de Chavalon

Breakfast - Fredy's Tucan, Memos the Pancake House

Fine dining - Timari, Chef Roger

Most romantic - Le Cliff, Chef Roger, Las Cazuelas

Best View - Las Carmelitas

Best steaks - Los Pibes, Brazil (all you can eat)

Best chile relleno - La Ronda, Café Repollo Rojo, Caballo Prieto Azabache

Best burger - Hard Rock Café, Planet Hollywood, Cheeseburger in Paradise

Best BBQ ribs - El Torito, Mickey’s No Name Cafe

Best tacos - Tacos los Arcos, taco stand in Boca de Tomatlan

Best quesadillas - Tacos del Cunado

Best pizza - Italian style: Espresso Bar Como Pizza, American style: Tarantinos

Best tamales - El Campanario

My favorites - Las Cazuelas, Tacos del Cunado, Miguelitos, beach restaurants in Boca de Tomatlan

Best Way To Get Around:

Downtown is fairly small and pleasant for walking if you don’t mind some hills. Town is not very wheelchair friendly but ramps are finally being put into the sidewalks in some areas. Walking is fairly safe at all hours. The crime rate is low.

Buses go everywhere and run frequently. The main destinations are written on the windshield. They run from 6am to midnight (most routes) and the fare is 4.50 pesos (US .45) or 5.00 pesos (US .50) depending on the route. Taxis are reasonably priced within town. Be sure to agree on the cost before you get in. The price is based on how many zones you travel, many hotels have a list showing the zones and the legal fares. Taxi drivers are a good source of information but sometimes unreliable for store and restaurant recommendations. They will often suggest an establishment that gives them a kickback.

Its located on the hotel patio next to the swimming pool. There are beautifully tended tropical plants all around, including a wonderfully fragrant frangipangi. At night the candlelight, the setting, and the heady tropical scent make this place very romantic. Le Gourmet is open from 8am to 11pm every day. Breakfast is my favorite meal here, but dinner is also exceptional. The last time I came here it was for lunch and I was very disappointed--I hope it was just an off day.

The breakfast menu offers some typical Mexican items, 11 flavors of pancakes and waffles for 37 pesos (US$3.70) and omelettes with many different fillings for 42 pesos (US$4.20). My favorite is the Heronio Omelette, stuffed with spinach, cheese, bell peppers, and mushrooms. The Monkey Business Pancakes are covered with bananas and nuts and topped with what looks like monkey turds. They are actually quite tasty. For lunch, soups, salads, sandwiches, seafood, and antojitos are served. The last time we were here I had the Enchiladas Suizas for 44 pesos (US$4.40). They were insipid and cold. A friend had the Chalupas (42 pesos), which were just as bad. Someone else ordered the club sandwich (47 pesos), which wasn’t very good either. My mom had the chicken salad (42 pesos), which was okay, and I started with the onion soup (37 pesos), which was actually very good.

Dinner is what this restaurant is known for. They offer a tasty assortment of appetizers and pasta dishes. For the main dish, they offer a little of everything and a lot of steak and seafood dishes. The Gourmet Medallions are wonderful--three steak medallions topped with three different sauces: brandy-mushroom, rich Italian and Béarnaise (157 pesos, US$15.70). The Fish Filet Rio Cuale is also excellent. It is a red snapper stuffed with spinach, shrimp, and almonds topped with hollandaise sauce and Parmesan. (126 pesos, US$12.60). Le Gourmet accepts Visa, MasterCard, and American Express.

The restaurant is on one side of a large courtyard, across from what I assume is the owners' house. It is very clean and decorated with ranch implements. The food is very Mexican and very good. At lunch, you can have something off the menu or have comida corrida. This fixed-price meal, which costs 31 pesos (US$3.10), includes soup, a choice from two or three main dishes, rice, beans, handmade tortillas, and fruit water. It is usually very good. For dinner, mostly antojitos are served (taquitos, enchiladas, tostadas… ). They are inexpensive and delicious.

Although I like all of their food, I do have my favorites. For breakfast, the Huevos Ahogados (28 pesos/US$2.80) can’t be beat: two eggs poached and served in a chile-laced tomato broth accompanied by beans and handmade tortillas. For lunch, the comida corrida is the best bet, although the chiles rellenos (44 pesos/US$4.40) are pretty special. For dinner, try the picadillo enchiladas (28 pesos/US$2.80) or the flautas (28 pesos/US$2.80), which are a lot like taquitos.

He has painted murals on the walls. He is a poet and has hung his work out for everyone to see. Take the time to read these short poems; some of them are quite funny. The menu is long and there is a great variety on the items offered. When I used to stay in this part of town I would come in almost daily and eat Enchiladas Huastecas. They are absolutely wonderful! The tortillas are folded into triangles, instead of rolled, and covered with green sauce and crumbly cheese. They are served with a thin steak and some of the most incredible beans I have ever had. They cost 55 pesos (US$5.50).

The seafood is always very fresh and sometimes they have great daily specials. They offer a large assortment of soups but I am pretty sure the cream soups come out of a can. If you are here on a hot day, be sure to sit under the best fan, this place can get pretty stuffy. Las Tres Huastecas is open daily 7am to 8pm and does not accept credit cards.

Fredy’s Tucan, connected to the hotel Posada de Roger, is on Basilio Badillo, also known as Restaurant Row, and serves some of the best breakfasts in town. It is a popular restaurant and usually crowded. To avoid having to wait for a table, come at 8am, when they first open, or after noon, but they close at 2:30pm. The bar stays open all day and into the wee hours.

The entrance to the restaurant is through the bar. The bar is pleasant but boring. It has many windows looking out onto the street, a few tables, a long bar with stools, and air-conditioning. The tables in this area are nonsmoking, but I don’t think the bar is. The main seating area is past the bar in a beautiful plant-filled courtyard decorated with toucans. There are papier-mâché toucans, framed paintings of toucans, and even murals with toucans; it works. It feels like a tropical, yet somehow not tacky, paradise.

Fredy’s Tucan is only open for breakfast, but sometimes offers lunch-like meals, such as fish filet or shrimp, as the daily special. The menu is extensive and affordable. You can choose from 12 flavors of pancakes or waffles costing 30 or 32 pesos ($3). There are also many different omelets to choose from for 34 pesos ($3). For a bit more, you can have the Florentine omelet, one of my favorites, stuffed with shrimp and spinach and covered in hollandaise sauce. There are also traditional Mexican breakfasts on the menu; I heartily recommend the Desayuno Campesino, which comes with skirt steak, beans, and chilaquiles. This morning I tried the Machaca, which is eggs scrambled with shredded beef, poblano peppers, onions, and tomatoes, served with beans and tortillas; it was tasty.

There is an abundance of waiters; some are extremely friendly, some are very proper, but all seem to be efficient. Though I have never seen the kitchen staff, I believe them to be miracle workers, as the food comes out hot, freshly made, and within minutes.

I have found two tiny inconveniences to point out. Credit cards are not accepted, and the women’s bathroom, though clean, is made for petite people - I almost got stuck!

Fredy’s Tucan is in the "Romantic Zone" on the south side of town. It is on the corner of Vallarta and Basilio Badillo. To get there by bus, take a "centro" bus almost all the way to the southern end of the route and get off on the corner of Carranza and Vallarta (in front of El Torito or Señor Frog’s). Walk one block south along Vallarta. Turn right on Basilio Badillo and the entrance is on the right.

Fredy’s Tucan Restaurant & Bar
Basilio Badillo #245, "Calle de los Cafes"
Telefono: 223-0778
fredystucan@hotmail.com
Puerto Vallarta, Jalisco, Mexico

Surrounding the marina in Vallarta is a horseshoe shaped promenade with condominiums, restaurants and shops. On the eastern side of the horseshoe, almost at the tip, is Antojitos Chabelita, a new restaurant. It serves inexpensive Mexican food and has a pleasant view of the boats in the marina and the lighthouse shaped bar on the other side. It is open 9am-9pm and does not accept credit cards.

The restaurant is divided by a walkway. Inside is the kitchen and bar. Outside is the dining area; it has ten tables covered by a red awning. There is also seating on the walkway, which is much cooler. We were here just before Independence Day, 16 de Septiembre, so the whole place was decked out in red, white and green. There were paper lanterns, streamers and paper cutouts everywhere.

When we arrived, a very nervous waiter quickly seated us. He took our drink order and skittered off; within seconds our drinks were in front of us and we had menus. The food offered is mostly typical Mexican such as enchiladas, burritas, tacos and chiles rellenos. The menu also has an "El Americano" section offering burgers, sandwiches, hotdogs and ribs.

We took our time with the menu while the waiter anxiously circled. I ordered the carne asada and Bruja chose the cheeseburger. The waiter literally ran to the kitchen with our order. We heard a terrible racket and a little red motor scooter came tearing out of the bar area and screeched past our table; our waiter had deliveries to make. We heard him screaming, "Five minutes, only five minutes!" True to his word, he was back in five minutes and serving us our lunch, piping hot.

My carne asada (grilled beef) was OK; it came with sautéed onions, rice, beans, a quesadilla and a small salad. The cheeseburger was good and came with fries and coleslaw. Unlike most restaurants in the marina, the food was very inexpensive. The burger cost 44 pesos (US$4) and the carne asada only 39 pesos (US$3.50). Most items on the menu are in the 30 to 40 peso range, ribs are the exception at 119 pesos.

We asked for the bill and our waiter immediately handed it to us. Nervously he asked if the service had been to our liking. When we replied that it had, he smiled broadly and the nervousness just seemed to disappear. It turns out it was his first day at work and I am guessing his first day on a motor scooter too.

To get here by bus, take a "marina" bus or any other that has aeropuerto or central c. on the windshield. Get off at Plaza Neptuno (a shopping center with an ugly Neptune statue on its roof) next to the whale statue. From the back of Plaza Neptuno take the angled street to the marina (one block), turn left, Antojitos Chabelita is the fourth or fifth locale.

Los Arbolitos has been around for many years. It started as a small family run restaurant serving typical Mexican food at very reasonable prices. Somewhere along the way, it became the sweetheart of Americans and Canadians looking for the"real"Mexico. Soon the place was packed (rarely a national face to be seen), the restaurant made larger and the prices soared. Over the last couple of years the madness has died down. Eating here last week with my mother there were only three tables occupied, one by an actual Mexican family! If after all that I have said you wonder why we bother going back, the reason is simple, the food is good, not great, but consistently good. In addition, the view is a pleasant change and the wait staff always makes one feel welcome without overwhelming.

Los Arbolitos is three stories tall and overlooks the Rio Cuale. On the ground floor is a kitchen area, the day we were there it no longer had seating. On the second floor, up a steep flight of steps, is a store selling Mexican handicrafts, mostly pottery and glassware. I spotted a couple of nice dish sets. Up another steep flight of stairs is the dinning area.

The dining area is breezy and festive. Plants and colorful paper streamers hang from the ceiling, tables are covered with bright Mexican blankets, one wall has a fun mural depicting the area and the other walls have prints done by local artists. At the back of the room is a little stage, the waiter informed us that mariachis play Wednesday and Saturday nights. We were here during the day but the canned stuff being piped in was just fine.

The waiter seated us and promptly brought freshly made chips and salsa for us to nibble on while we looked at the menus. The prices seemed a bit steep to me but since we were there between 1pm and 5pm we could also order off the lunch special menu, which has very reasonable prices and drinks at half price. The grilled chicken on the normal menu costs 90 pesos ($9US) and on the special menu 40 pesos ($4US). The special menu offers grilled chicken, grilled beef and many seafood dishes. The normal menu offers mostly Mexican fare and seafood.

Despite the prices I ordered the Mexican plate off the normal menu for 120 pesos. It came with carne asada, a chile relleno, a tamal, a burrito, an enchilada, beans and guacamole. Everything was good. My mom ordered the chiles rellenos, also off the regular menu for 80 pesos. Bruja was the only one to order off the special menu and her lunch was by far the best. She had the cilantro fish filet, which was absolutely wonderful and cost only 50 pesos. Overall, we had a very satisfying meal.

Los Arbolitos is open daily from 11am-11pm and accepts Visa and MasterCard. It is on the corner of Camino de la Rivera and Lazaro Cardenas, just before the bridge.

The waiter greeted us and asked where we preferred to sit. There is service on the beach, but under the little palapas we saw no tables, good for snacks maybe, but we were hungry. There is also seating on the covered terrace and inside the restaurant. The terrace had a nice breeze and a great view. We sat. We were given the menus, the prices were quite reasonable. We ordered.

Between the two of us, we ordered nachos, a fruit salad, black bean soup, shrimp salad, and a cheeseburger. The nachos came out first, a very generous serving with plenty of cheese. The salsa looked great; it was very fresh but tasteless. Next came the fruit and soup. Once again, the fruit was lovely and fresh but rather insipid; the soup was actually very good. My mother received her shrimp salad, presented beautifully, but you guessed it, boring. Mom tried dumping the salsa on it, but tasteless + boring = blah! The cheeseburger was fine, a typical Mexican beach burger.

As disappointing as the food was I do plan to go back. The service was fast and friendly. The waiter noticed when our drinks were empty and when an ashtray was needed. He was there when we wanted him and always attentive.

The location is great, on the beach with a great view of the mountains and of the Los Muertos pier but far enough away not to be so hectic. The Beachcomber is under the condominiums Villas Vista del Sol, right next door to the Hotel Molino de Agua, in the so-called Romantic Zone.

The drinks were good, not expensive, and happy hour is from 1pm to 2pm, and again from 6pm to 8pm. Oh, I will definitely go back, but next time I will sit under a palapa, wiggle my toes in the sand and of course, drink.

The Beachcomber is open from 8:30am - 10:30pm, closed Mondays, and serves all three meals. Breakfast is reputed to be quite good, one of these days I might try it. The menu is extensive and the prices are low considering the area, running from 40 pesos ($4US) for the cheeseburger with fries and salad, to 140 pesos ($14US) for the coconut shrimp, with most of the items in-between falling closer to the burger than the shrimp in price. The Beachcomber does not accept credit cards.

From almost anywhere in town, you can look up at the top of the mountains and see a little thatched roof shack - this is Las Carmelitas. The best way to get here is by cab, as the closest bus drops you over 1 mile away. If you are driving, take the Par-Vial (the road that connects Libramiento to the malecon) and go north at the tiny traffic circle. To the right is the entrance gate, where you will be charged 50 pesos ($5) per person. The entrance fee will be deducted from your bill. From here, follow the dirt road up the mountain and you will eventually arrive at the restaurant.

The restaurant is open-air, with a palapa roof, and sits on the edge of a steep hill. The 15 or so tables are covered in bright tablecloths; no other decoration is needed. The view is spectacular. For a wider view, go up the little hill next to the restaurant. From here, you can see all of Vallarta and the nearby towns.

The staff at Las Carmelitas is friendly and helpful. They love and are proud of the restaurant, and it shows. They have a way of making you feel at home, be it by wrapping a tablecloth around you when it gets cold, remembering your favorite drink, or showing you family photos. They also do a great job serving, but be warned that because of the kind of fire they use, meals can take quite awhile to appear.

Las Carmelitas serves ranch-style food, mostly meats grilled over a wood fire, but also offers seafood prepared in a typical Mexican style. The steaks are incredible, full of wood-smoke flavor. You can choose from arrachera (skirt steak) or New York filet mignon, rib-eye, or T-bone; the arrachera is marinated and usually the most tender, not to mention the cheapest at 90 pesos ($9), compared to 140 pesos ($14) for the other cuts. The grilled chorizo covered with cheese is also another of my favorites for 60 pesos. The seafood is fresh and well prepared, but not as special as the meat. Jumbo shrimp cost 190 pesos, and the fish filet is 85 pesos. The only option for vegetarians is the quesadillas (60 pesos). As soon as you order, the waiter brings chips, salsa, guacamole, and cactus salad, and all meals come with rice, grilled green onions, and fresh, handmade tortillas.

Although almost everybody in Vallarta knows about Las Carmelitas, it somehow still feels like a secret. When people ask for a good restaurant, my first suggestion is always Las Carmelitas. No trip is complete without a visit here.

We walked in and were immediately asked if we wanted smoking or non-smoking, which is an oddity in Vallarta. We were given menus and our drink orders were taken. The restaurant is bright, cheerful, and clean and the air conditioning works beautifully. The menu offers a wide selection of foods, most of which you would expect in a coffee shop. Many Mexican dishes are available. The prices are quite reasonable. Breakfast runs from 39 pesos (US$3.90) for waffles to 60 pesos (US$6.00) for the Norteño breakfast, which comes with fruit or juice, eggs scrambled with shredded beef covered with salsa, beans, tortillas, and coffee or tea. There is an impressive assortment of main course salads costing from 43 pesos to 70 pesos. Steaks cost about 90 pesos as do fish dishes; most chicken dishes cost about 80 pesos.

The waitress promptly took our orders. I asked for the Puntas de Res con Sopes, beef tips in a spicy tomato based salsa served with sopes, which are fat little tortillas with a ridge around the edge to hold in the filling -- beans, cheese, cream, and salsa in this case. Bruja ordered the chef salad. Our meals were quickly delivered. The food was ok and the portions were small. I decided I wanted some dessert so I looked around for the waitress. Up until this point, our service had been good. I could not get the attention of a single waitress. They were all at the back of the restaurant doing something; I finally went to give the waitress my order. About fifteen minutes later I got my ice-cream which was the tastiest part of the meal. When it was time to go, once again we couldn’t get the attention of any waitress. We finally got the bill and had to wait at the counter for the cashier to charge us.

Although the service was terrible for the last half of our meal, I might go back. I don’t think the service can always be this bad and I have to admit the ice-cream was good and the air-conditioning was great.

VIPS is in the Wal-Mart parking lot and is close to the cruise ship marina. To get here from downtown take any bus that has "aeropuerto", "central c." or "marina’ on the windshield. Get off at Sam’s; you can’t miss it.

Having said this I must admit that I do, on occasion, frequent these restaurants. No Hooters at home? Try the one here. For the best burger in Vallarta it is a toss up between Cheeseburger in Paradise, Planet Hollywood, and the Hard Rock Café. For the best prime rib, go to Outback Steakhouse. McDonald's is McDonald's, but you can count on good air-conditioning and clean bathrooms. And, last but not least, sometimes these places are the easiest solution for a fussy child . . . . . . . . . . McDonalds(1), In Plaza Marina, 8am - 11pm .......... McDonalds (3), Corner of Paseo Dias Ordas and 31 de Octubre, 7am - 11pm, walk up window ‘til 4am .......... McDonalds (4), Francisca Rodriguez almost on the beach in front of the Los Muertos Pier .......... BugerKing (3), On Juarez across the street from the plaza .......... Hooters (3), Zaragoza almost corner of Morelos on the south end of Malecon, 10am - 1am, Visa, MasterCard and American Express .......... Outback Steakhouse (2), Fco. Medina Ascencio 9456, between Pitillal River Bridge and Montesori Tel. 225-4911, 1:30pm - 11pm, a little later on weekends, Visa, MasterCard and American Express Non smoking area .......... Cheeseburger in Paradise (3), Paseo Diaz Ordaz #740 (Malecon), corner of Vicario Tel. 223-2328, Daily 11am -Midnight, Visa, MasterCard and American Express .......... Hard Rock Café (3), Paseo Diaz Ordaz 652, corner of Abasolo, Tel. 222-5532 and 222-2230 Daily 11am-Midnight bar ‘til 2am, Live Music 10pm - 1:30 am Tuesday - Sunday Visa, MasterCard and American Express, non-smoking section .......... Planet Hollywood (3), Morelos 518, corner of Galeana, Tel. 223-2710 Daily 11am-Midnight, Visa, MasterCard and American Express .......... Dominos (3), Zaragoza 120-A, between Morelos and the beach, Tel [223] 1425, 1426 and 0201 Daily 11am-1am, Delivery .......... Dominos (2), Francisco Medina Ascencio 2180, outside Plaza Caracol Tel [224] 1222, 2222, and 3222, Daily 10am - 2am, Delivery .......... Pizza Hut (2), In the Plaza Caracol parking lot, 224-0933, 34 and 35 Daily 11am - midnight, Delivery

............BIRRIERIA DON POLO
San Salvador, between Ecuador and Bolivia
Daily 9am-4pm............

BIRRIERIA JARAMILLO
Av. Mexico 1287, between Nicaragua and Honduras
Daily 8:00am-10:30pm............

BIRRIERIA SAN SALVADOR
San Salvador, corner of Ecuador
Fri-Wed 8am-4pm............

BIRRIERIA EL COMPA
San Salvador 390, between Ecuador and Bolivia
9:30am - 4pm