As one of my roommates pointed out, going to London without visiting the Tower of London is worse- much worse- than going to London without watching the changing of the guards. Probably the single most infamous attraction; this is a hit with all ages. You'll see the famed ravens (legend says the Tower will fall if they leave), the site of various beheadings, and, perhaps most impressively, the Crown Jewels. You ride by these on a little people mover and you can't take pictures, but you won't forget what you see. Prepare for the weather and a good deal of walking here- there's much to explore. Also keep a meeting place in mind. It's bigger than you might think. Either take a guided tour or look around yourself. We were fine on our own but also got very good recommendations from those lead by a fun and friendly guard.

The Tower of London is 900 years old, and has, at various times, been a royal palace, a fortress, and a prison. We made it to the Tower in time for one of the Yeoman Warders' Tours. The yeoman warders are the official guards of the Tower of London: each of them has to have had at least 15 years (I think) of military service, and has to have shown loyalty to the queen, before one can be accepted as a warder. The warders, however, also act as tour guides to the castle, and what wonderful guides they are!

The warder who led our tour gave us an hour-long orientation walk of the castle, punctuated with theatrical and funny stories about the people who had lived, been imprisoned, been executed, or died there. It was a very good tour, and we thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it. I don't think our visit to the Tower would have been quite as good if we hadn't join the Yeoman Warder's Tour.

After the orientation walk, we went to see the Crown Jewels, and then some of the military exhibits. Particularly memorable were the prison in Beauchamp Tower (with prisoners' graffiti still preserved on the walls) and an exhibit about Guy Fawkes.

The tower began to close before we had managed to see the entire castle, but my husband comforted us by pointing out that this gave us a reason to come back and visit the tower again in the future. After leaving the tower, we walked along the bank of the Thames for a little bit, before heading back home.

The Tower of London is open Mondays to Fridays from 9am to 9pm and on weekends and bank holidays from 10am to 5pm. Tickets are GBP 16 for adults and bookings can be made by phone via + 44 870 756 7070. The Yeoman Warders' tours last about an hour and begin every half hour.

Get there on a weekday before it opens to avoid long lines. Have a cup of coffee and enjoy the view of the Thames. Be sure to explore each tower, since the Tower of London is actually made up of several towers built over hundreds of years. There is a guided tour by a charming man in traditional garb, but only go if you are patient and don't have children. He talks a lot and thinks he's really funny. The audio tour is pretty good and lets you go at your own pace without a huge group following the same route. Be sure to see Sir Walter Raleigh's chambers too.

This entry is a continuation of my Tower of London: The Guard Laughs entry.

The guard reacted the instant the man’s foot hit the ground—he pulled his gun off his shoulder and started charging with his bayonet! The man nearly wet himself and ran off into the distance. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had jumped into the Thames! As soon as the man was gone, the guard shouldered his gun and was back to normal.

Of course, all of this gave us even more reason to laugh. What an idiot! Unfortunately for us, we were the only ones at the scene when one of the tower Beefeaters arrived. The Beefeaters are essentially just tour guides and various forms of security around the place, and are the guys dressed in navy outfits and hats. I personally prefer their more traditional red and yellow outfits, but I don’t think this Beefeater would have appreciated me telling him that at this point in time.

He was not a happy man. As he walked quickly towards us, he began yelling. "The Tower Guards are here for security purposes, not entertainment! This is a very serious matter!" he yelled at us.

"I’m sorry, but we didn’t do anything. The man that tried to stand next to the guard ran away." I said.

"I’ve seen you standing here all day harassing this guard," he said, and wouldn’t hear any more of any of our arguments. Before we knew it, a few more Beefeaters had arrived and we were being escorted out of the Tower. Needless to say, our coach was not very happy with us, especially since we were all wearing our "John Newcombe Tennis Ranch" jackets. All I seemed to do the entire day was stand back and laugh, and I got thrown out of the Tower for it! But, I think it was all worth it to see the Tower guard laugh for the first, and very likely only, time in my life.

This entry is a continuation of The Tower of London: The Crown Jewels.

After causing enough trouble in the Jewels, we wandered around the outside of the Tower’s keep. We poked our heads in a few doors, but no one was very motivated to go inside and look at much. Soon, we found ourselves back in front of the Crown Jewels guard, who was busying himself staring into space and playing with his gun every once in awhile. Shane stood in front of him, imitating the guard, and we soon turned to trying to make Shane laugh instead, since it was slightly easier. Then, Chuy, the guy who had been taking pictures in the Jewels, had a question for the guard (it’s a bit vulgar, so if you don’t want to read it, skip the rest of this paragraph). He walked up to the guard and asked, "So, if a hot girl walks by, and you get a boner, does that count as moving?"

The guard actually laughed! He definitely stopped himself immediately, but he laughed and cracked a smile as he was trying to stop himself. We were all totally amazed—I had talked to plenty of guards, and even had my brother as a baby poke one, and never had they budged or done anything but look into the distance. We all couldn’t stop laughing because of it, although we were sad that Shane had turned off his video camera 5 minutes previously!

As we were standing around the guard laughing, a man walked up to us. He said, unfortunately in an American accent (showing the world just how intelligent Americans could be), "I don’t think that there guard is real. He has to be a statue from Madame Tussaud’s!"

"But, how does he move?" one of us asked him.

"Of course, he’s got batteries in him! Now, who wants a picture with the nice guard?" he asked.

"We have pictures already, thanks."

"No, I mean a picture with your arm around the guard!" he said as he started putting one leg over the 3-foot tall metal bar separating us from the guard.

This entry is continued in The Tower of London: Getting Thrown Out.